I have some karma that is challenging me right about now. Actually, more challenges than I would like to handle at once. But maybe they are all keeping me from obsessing about any just one, and getting myself into real trouble. I keep waiting for it to hit, and hit hard. I'm talking about having the man that i'm totally nuts about tell me that he is "goofy", he "doesn't know" what he wants, he knows he misses me, that he wants to "be friends" with me...but he doesn't love me. :(
OK, you don't have to beat me with it. It's hard to swallow but down it goes.
Damn this rollercoaster. Damn my self esteem - I'm going to get off this particular ride and get me some more of that there self worth stuff!
I've had to speak with him recently on the phone. We had an issue to resolve. I could of been a real bitch and screwed him over, but i'm not like that. Really! I'm not.
Kill 'em with kindness.
Anyway, as luck would have it, I recieved this meditation from some subscription newsletter and it really seems to help! I think i'll print this one and keep it handy.
Embracing Your Karma Visualization
Karma is an expression of divine love.Everything that comes to us is made especially for us by God—to free us from all limitation.
Visualize God as the Divine Mother, standing before you. (You can visualize Yogananda or another saint if you prefer.)
See Her eyes gazing deeply into your own, filling you with Her love. Know that She is with you, always.
Think now of a karma that is challenging for you.
See Divine Mother holding before you this karmic test. See Her smile as she reaches out and offers this test to you with loving kindness. Reach out your arms and take hold of this karma. Bring this karmic challenge into your heart.
Accept this precious gift—sent from the Wisdom of the Universe. Know that it is a perfect gift, sent by Divine Mother, to help your soul become free.
In your heart embrace this karmic test fully, with gratitude and trust. This karma can help you raise your energy level and consciousness to where your Godly nature resides.
Focus now at the point between the eyebrows. See yourself rising to meet this karmic test and transcending its limitations.
See yourself becoming free in God. Feel the bliss of being united with Spirit.